I don't plan these thoughts in my mind, their just there. Yesterday and today I spent most of the day in bed. I had three naps today. And then I woke up and stayed in bed for a while.
The clock says 5,08 but it seems longer. I don't know. I am seeing a psychiatrist and a counselor but I'm still here in my comfortable fetal position.
As usual, Jean Luc is always there to comfort me. Either that or I'm sleeping like a cat. I mean every time I wake up and he's there. Maybe that's the reason he's so chiflado.
More later...
29 February 2012
24 February 2012
Downer
Hello Everyone! What a difference a day makes. One day I was manic about cleaning everything, and then the next day I was depressed and stayed in bed. I've been staying in bed a lot recently.
Chiflado gets the blues and there's nothing to help him. Not even the happy pills work when I get like this. Wish I had just one pill to get everything over and done with. When my doctor or the nutritionist ask if there's anything I need, I always say cyanide which they laugh off.
For some reason I manage to move forward and challenge whatever comes my way. People say I was put here for a reason and I always come on top.
Chiff out.
Chiflado gets the blues and there's nothing to help him. Not even the happy pills work when I get like this. Wish I had just one pill to get everything over and done with. When my doctor or the nutritionist ask if there's anything I need, I always say cyanide which they laugh off.
For some reason I manage to move forward and challenge whatever comes my way. People say I was put here for a reason and I always come on top.
Chiff out.
23 February 2012
Blue Boy
It's that time of the year. I am depressed and don't know why. I was in bed most of the day in the fetal position. I'm in a bother or burden state of mind. Yes I take my meds, but nothing works when I'm in this mood.
Some has to do with the month. February is always a monetary problem. Even when I was working, it sneaked up on me. Days go by in and out of my life, hard to keep track of.
I was talking to HP tonight and told me I'm ready for the oven. It's one of those I want to die kind of mood. My funeral was taken care of way back in 1980. I really need to get a new copy. I have the carbon copies and they're kinda hard to read. My friend C laughed at the part where I will be disposed of immediately and no service. Of course there will not be a notice in the paper. Do you know expensive that is? Besides, I am a nobody and have lived with that all my life.
We'll see what happens next. I really try my best but I feel like a fraud most of the time. And on that note, I will say good night.
Chiffie out.
Some has to do with the month. February is always a monetary problem. Even when I was working, it sneaked up on me. Days go by in and out of my life, hard to keep track of.
I was talking to HP tonight and told me I'm ready for the oven. It's one of those I want to die kind of mood. My funeral was taken care of way back in 1980. I really need to get a new copy. I have the carbon copies and they're kinda hard to read. My friend C laughed at the part where I will be disposed of immediately and no service. Of course there will not be a notice in the paper. Do you know expensive that is? Besides, I am a nobody and have lived with that all my life.
We'll see what happens next. I really try my best but I feel like a fraud most of the time. And on that note, I will say good night.
Chiffie out.
19 February 2012
Nasty Taste
I spent part of the day spewing breakfast and lunch. I was careful with dinner and had a bagel. I think I got a tad ambitious with today. But it was not to be.
Of course I spent most of the day in bed and getting up to take care of business. The other times I do get up in the middle of the night and see if any of the guys want to come out.
And then when I least expected, I started vomiting again. At least there was no blood this time around.
HP knows what I'm going through, he's gone through several of my symptons, so he can be there for me. He really tries his best, but sometimes I'm just not in the mood.
Don't worry. It comes and goes. I like it when it comes along and I can get things done for him. He is a very special man who saved me several times.
Chiffie
Of course I spent most of the day in bed and getting up to take care of business. The other times I do get up in the middle of the night and see if any of the guys want to come out.
And then when I least expected, I started vomiting again. At least there was no blood this time around.
HP knows what I'm going through, he's gone through several of my symptons, so he can be there for me. He really tries his best, but sometimes I'm just not in the mood.
Don't worry. It comes and goes. I like it when it comes along and I can get things done for him. He is a very special man who saved me several times.
Chiffie
17 February 2012
Waiting
I've waited all week for the chair to be delivered. I just got frustrated with the whole mess. They did say they would deliver if I paid for delivery. Otherwise I have to wait until there's another downtown delivery.
If it's not raining tomorrow, D and her husband L will take me to get the chair. A lot depends on what they say when I call again tomorrow. I hate waiting.
HP came over with Subway's subs and the last two DVDs in the Harry Potter series. Loved it. HP says we saw the last one together. I don't remember it. That's a plus when my memory disappears and everything is new to me.
We'll see what tomorrow brings. I just want my chair.
Chiffie out.
If it's not raining tomorrow, D and her husband L will take me to get the chair. A lot depends on what they say when I call again tomorrow. I hate waiting.
HP came over with Subway's subs and the last two DVDs in the Harry Potter series. Loved it. HP says we saw the last one together. I don't remember it. That's a plus when my memory disappears and everything is new to me.
We'll see what tomorrow brings. I just want my chair.
Chiffie out.
15 February 2012
Merry Maid
It came outta nowhere. I got the clean bug. I went on a cleaning rampage. I swept, mopped, and vacuumed. This was easy. Tomorrow I might hit the tub. The infamous tub that was my torture chamber not so long ago. Still seams like it was last week rather than a year and a half.
I even washed my bed spread and JL's pillow. He loves it when I do laundry and he goes crazy with the warmth and scent. Sho'nuf, he went crazy with the spread and then he ran to his pillow and started sniffing and kicking around. He's such a spoiled child.
Nothing else going on. I've spent this past week waiting to get a chair I got at Desks Galore. They advertise on TV, so I thought I'd get better service. The ad says they will deliver the next day. What they don't say is there is a $90 for that delivery. My chair will magically appear when they have other deliveries in downtown. In other words, wait.
Ya'll have a fabulous day.
Chiff
I even washed my bed spread and JL's pillow. He loves it when I do laundry and he goes crazy with the warmth and scent. Sho'nuf, he went crazy with the spread and then he ran to his pillow and started sniffing and kicking around. He's such a spoiled child.
Nothing else going on. I've spent this past week waiting to get a chair I got at Desks Galore. They advertise on TV, so I thought I'd get better service. The ad says they will deliver the next day. What they don't say is there is a $90 for that delivery. My chair will magically appear when they have other deliveries in downtown. In other words, wait.
Ya'll have a fabulous day.
Chiff
Birthday Boy
Happy 38th birthday to fabulous singer Robbie Williams. So many images to choose on him. I got this just because I prefer black and white pictures.
11 February 2012
Birthday Boy
Happy 51st Birthday to hottie George Stephanopoulos. He's got the whole package going, nice smile, hot nalgas, and that award winning smile.
10 February 2012
A Babe!
So there I was getting into the elevator when I heard a voice to hold it for him. Hold what =)
In he walked with his bike. His name is F and he's gotta be at least 6'7", I mean I had to look up to him. My eyes were in front of his nipples which is one of the things that I find attractive in a man.
So we introduced each other and I gave him my name and unit number. He's probably in his late teens early twenties. He's so young. I could be an older brother to him. More like a grandmother I can hear HP say.
We've seen each other more and more often. I want him. But he's so young. He looks like he's twelve or something like that.
I'm forever looking for him to casually bump into him. Guess I'll keep you abreast, get it?, of the situation.
Chiffie
In he walked with his bike. His name is F and he's gotta be at least 6'7", I mean I had to look up to him. My eyes were in front of his nipples which is one of the things that I find attractive in a man.
So we introduced each other and I gave him my name and unit number. He's probably in his late teens early twenties. He's so young. I could be an older brother to him. More like a grandmother I can hear HP say.
We've seen each other more and more often. I want him. But he's so young. He looks like he's twelve or something like that.
I'm forever looking for him to casually bump into him. Guess I'll keep you abreast, get it?, of the situation.
Chiffie
09 February 2012
Hectic Thursday
I almost wrote Friday, it was kinda sorta bad day. I waited for 30 minutes for the 91 Fredericksburg Rd skip stop. Then we hit the train waiting more time. Then the bus driver said one of the tires was flat and we could wait for another bus or go to the stops we just left or the coming stop.
I stayed put. Sho'nuf we walked to the new bus. The route does not stop at the next stop but we did today because of the flat. So we got everybody back in and what do you think happened? We had another train! !Ahi Caramba!
So I get to the stop I needed which was on the opposite side of Fredericksburg. So there I was schlepping through all the mess. Traffic was horrible of course. I finally made it to the suite of my psychiatrist and there were six buildings to choose from.
Being the adventurer that I am, I went into the first building and voila!, there it was. I was PO'd until I opened the door and was greeted with nice calming music. I filled out paperwork and was immediately taken in to Dr J's office.
Dr J is my kinda man. He's attractive and smart and listens and remembers everything I've talked to him about. A man who listens?, again, how often do you see that?
We had a nice visit. I calmed down with him and updated my chart and talked about a medication suggested by my neurologist. So that was that, I crossed over to the shopping strip and got me some bagels. They were out of my favourite bagel, but the manager said next time I go out I can call ahead and they'll have a fresh batch waiting for me.
Then I caught up with HP and had dinner at the Black Eyed Pea. He too had an exhausting day at work. We were gonna do HEB, but he was too tired and I was semi-frazzled, so we can go tomorrow.
I finally came home and had me a fabulous refreshing beverage. And how was your day?
Chif out
I stayed put. Sho'nuf we walked to the new bus. The route does not stop at the next stop but we did today because of the flat. So we got everybody back in and what do you think happened? We had another train! !Ahi Caramba!
So I get to the stop I needed which was on the opposite side of Fredericksburg. So there I was schlepping through all the mess. Traffic was horrible of course. I finally made it to the suite of my psychiatrist and there were six buildings to choose from.
Being the adventurer that I am, I went into the first building and voila!, there it was. I was PO'd until I opened the door and was greeted with nice calming music. I filled out paperwork and was immediately taken in to Dr J's office.
Dr J is my kinda man. He's attractive and smart and listens and remembers everything I've talked to him about. A man who listens?, again, how often do you see that?
We had a nice visit. I calmed down with him and updated my chart and talked about a medication suggested by my neurologist. So that was that, I crossed over to the shopping strip and got me some bagels. They were out of my favourite bagel, but the manager said next time I go out I can call ahead and they'll have a fresh batch waiting for me.
Then I caught up with HP and had dinner at the Black Eyed Pea. He too had an exhausting day at work. We were gonna do HEB, but he was too tired and I was semi-frazzled, so we can go tomorrow.
I finally came home and had me a fabulous refreshing beverage. And how was your day?
Chif out
Birthday Boy
Happy 57th birthday to Jim J. Bullock. Remember him from Too Close for Comfort and the middle square on TV's Hollywood Squares.
05 February 2012
Moody
HP and I got together Friday and I'd just gotten home from the doctor's office. We had lunch at Oasis and by the time I got home I wasn't feeling well.
I lay down while he surfed the net. I was very out of it and he gave me a great massage, from what I remember. Finally it was decided that he would go home and we'd get together Saturday.
I fell asleep and woke up feeling worse. I was burning up yet the thermometer reading was 97. Hmmmm.
I had talked to D and her husband L were gonna take me to look at a chair for the apartment. I called to cancel and she sounded concerned. It's the AIDS is what I like to say.
I did get together with HP Saturday but my mind's blank on what we did. Purple 13 likes to call it a senior moment. I have them all the time and I sometimes am in the middle of a sentence I forget and just say I got lost. I keep getting lost more and more frequently.
Nice way to start a month.
Chiffie out.
I lay down while he surfed the net. I was very out of it and he gave me a great massage, from what I remember. Finally it was decided that he would go home and we'd get together Saturday.
I fell asleep and woke up feeling worse. I was burning up yet the thermometer reading was 97. Hmmmm.
I had talked to D and her husband L were gonna take me to look at a chair for the apartment. I called to cancel and she sounded concerned. It's the AIDS is what I like to say.
I did get together with HP Saturday but my mind's blank on what we did. Purple 13 likes to call it a senior moment. I have them all the time and I sometimes am in the middle of a sentence I forget and just say I got lost. I keep getting lost more and more frequently.
Nice way to start a month.
Chiffie out.
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