PO'd

Sometimes I just want to give up on everything. What's the point of taking my meds? I feel healthy  most of the time.

Lately I've had a headache that won't go away. Every little thing might be big in the world of AIDS.

I'm pissed off at the world. I'm still depressed, but that's been going on for about 50 years. I don't think I'll ever get rid of that.

And then there's the financial aspect. In May Medicare started taking my premium out of my check. That means I'm short on cash for about $150. That's really hurting.

I get the minimum groceries. I do tend to buy what I want rather than the things I need. Still up the creek.

I have about several hundred dollars I have to pay for physical therapy. I was going to an agency that promised me they would pay my co-pays. Of course they weren't paying afterall.  

I thought nothing of it until I asked the agency if they were gonna be able to pay. I have to talk to my manager about it. Meaning no.

And then my therapist reprimanded me for something I didn't do. Like I said, I got  pissed off and stopped my therapy. I don't want anything to do with them.

I just want to get it over with. I went to see my psychiatrist today and got scripts for my mental situation. Again, why bother? I just go with the motion here.

They always ask if I have a plan. Duh?! Of course I do. I just don't have the courage to follow through. She asked if I have thoughts of killing myself. Again, duh?

I'm just tired of it all. Every little thing might be something big. I just want to give up. I'm tired. There's no point.

Chiflado out.