Marano

That's Spanish for pig. And I pigged out this week.

Sunday I went to lunch with Mike. We went to Jim's to check out the after-the-club crowd. We then went to go see This is Where I Leave You. The story of a dysfunctional family who gets together to sit shivah for the father. Funny!

Wednesday I went to Luby's with Doug. My clinic gives information dinners about AIDS topics. They talked about hepatitis C. Doug also brought me some cherry cobbler and apple crisp. They were delicious with coffee for breakfast.

Friday I went to a luncheon with Doug again. This was sponsored by the People's Caucus. They are a group of infected  and affected people with AIDS who set rules for social services for us. It was at a Tex-Mex restaurant I would not recommend but it was free food.

Today I did the family thing. Barbara and Jerry celebrated 21 years of marriage and Debra took us out to lunch. We went to the usual buffet where we pigged out. It's a Chinese buffet but I had American food. Go figure.

I'm exhausted! I normally have quiet weeks but this week was different. It's always great seeing my support system. I am truly blessed with my friends and family. Don't know what I'd do without them.

Chiflaco out.

Cold

Don't know if it's age or AIDS, but I've been cold for the past month or so. I love the cold and have been looking forward to fall and winter. I even learned how to knot my scarf in the fashionable way.

But I'm cold. I've actually been shivering. I wonder how I'm gonna react to the cold weather. Not that it gets cold here like in Michigan.

But for some reason I feel the cold more here then there. I owe it to the fact that it gets cold suddenly here. In Michigan it was cold for months and I didn't feel the cold that much. I was actually in short sleeves in winter. Here I'm in sweaters and long sleeves.

I know AIDS patients are delicate when it comes to temperatures. I hope that's not the case with me. I do so enjoy the cool weather. I'm kinda scared this time.

Chiflaco out.

Ben Gay Catnip!?!?!?

About three years ago, I woke up with a sharp pain in my right shoulder. It's been with me ever since. It actually dissipated for a bit but it just came back with a vengeance.

I got some Ben Gay and massage it into my shoulder as best I can. I really need somebody to work it in, hint, hint, anyone.

So I put it on and sit down. Jean-Luc went crazy with it. He climbed up on my chest and started nuzzling on my shoulder. He started purring and gyrating all over me. He usually does that when I give him catnip.

Guess there's catnip in Ben Gay. Who knew?

Chiflaco out.

Quiet Week

Nothing much going on. I did go to the clinic the other day for labs and to talk to my therapist. I did bring up the drinking problem. That was my main concern and took up the bulk of my visit.

I'm watching Ken Burns' The Roosevelts on PBS. A look into Teddy, Eleanor, and Franklin's lives. Very good. I'm mesmerized by the series. Brought a lot of insight into them. We never really studied Teddy but he was a Renaissance man. He was quite a character.

One thing interesting that came out is that both Teddy and FDR suffered from depression. Also, Eleanor was not that great a mother. I always thought she was because of her altruism. But that was not the case.

I feel old watching this series. Only older people would appreciate this. I don't think I would have watched anything like this thirty years ago. Makes me want to go back to school again.

Chiflaco out.

Matthew's Luncheon

Got together with the family this weekend. It was Matthew's 17th birthday. I still remember when Barbara told us she was pregnant. And I knew all along that it was gonna be a boy.

Tremors-They're B-A-A-A-C-K!!!

Ten years ago I had shingles and this led to my HIV+ status. I had them up and down my right arm. The bad part was that I was unable to eat with my right arm but I liked it because I lost weight.

I had a severe case of tremors. My right arm has just never recovered. My penmanship is horrendous and I can't hold a fork for the life of me.

I've had them for ten years and they have gotten better. But for some reason, they're back. I was at lunch with Doug the other day and he noticed me shaking. Doug is an older man I've talked about before. I call him my Silver Daddy.

So here I am shaking again. It could be the DTs since I've been drinking a lot lately. Don't know why, I just am. Mike asked if I'm depressed but I don't know. I just know that I'm drinking a lot. And not just my usual nightly glass of wine. I've been hitting the hard liquor. We're talking tequila and vodka. I just can't get enough.

I've gotten used to drinking in the late mornings and taking a nap afterwards. It's relaxing but it's still a problem. No I'm not alcoholic, I just love my booze. I'm in a daze most of the time because of it.

I wish I could stop but I can't. I won't. What's the use? Why stop drinking if it doesn't hurt me? It is hurting my pocket book, but I'm still able to function okay.

Fact is the tremors are back. They are annoying. I can't eat or write and keyboarding is a problem. I'm making due.

Chiflaco out.

Addiction

I officially have no life. I found Mark and Ethan in you tube and now I've found three other couples.

It's like watching a train wreck, I just can't get enough. RJ and Will are a couple in CA. Luke and Trent are from the UK and Australia. And Vinny and Luke are also from the UK although Vinny is American. Luke and Trent are married as are Vinny and Luke. RJ and will are engaged.

They're all cute couples. I must say I'm envious of their relationships. They are all in the honeymoon stage and they're all lovey dovey. Of course I think of all my relationships and how they all started off great. I pray these couples stay together.

RJ and Will have the longest relationship at four years. It's so nice to see these couples with the love and support of their families. I remember my parents were supportive of all my exes.

Chiflaco out.

Ladies Who Lunch

Went to lunch with Ernest today. We'd been looking forward to it for a while. We decided on Indian since we haven't had it in a while and I've been craving it like crazy.

We got to the buffet and quickly served ourselves. The food was scrumptious as always. They have something called paneer which is a spinach dish I like to drizzle on basmati rice.

I also got some chicken curry and lamb meatballs, again, delicious. We filled up pretty quick. We chatted a bit before going up for round two. But that was about it. We only ate two plates of food. I thought for sure I'd eat more since I had been looking forward to lunch.

We came home and he showed me how to use my scanner. I can be quite the blonde sometimes. Now I should add more to my blog that nobody reads. That's what Mike says. I don't care, it's for me anyway. And if someone should care about me, good, they know what's going on in my life.

I pulled out my backgammon set and he let me win three times. We hadn't played in years but it came back pretty quick. His main problem is setting up the board and it's pretty easy after that.

He gets along with Jean-Luc, who doesn't? There's still that something between us. We talked about a lot of things including relationships. Don't know if I'm seeing things into it, but there's an unknown that we don't want to talk about.

We get along well. He does look out after me. We have the same sense of humour and he's one of the few intelligent people I know. Yeah, we fit together well. If you got to check out Mark and Ethan, that's how me and Ernest are.

I caught him looking at me several times. And I have to admit I looked at him a lot. I still find him attractive after 27 years. We haven't seen each other in a while and it takes so little to jump in to each other. Guess we'll pussy foot around for another 27 years.

And after catching up with Mark and Ethan, I think I'm ready for a relationship. I miss being with someone. I miss looking out after someone and somebody looking out for me. It's like I tell Mike, I cook, bake, clean, do yard work, I'm a catch.

But where am I gonna meet Mr Right? I can't even meet Mr Right for Tonight! I've never been one to play the field and I'm not about to start now. I just know that if I should get in another relationship, it's for keeps.

Chiflaco out.

Methan

 

When I get bored I go on You Tube. Whoever came up with this is a masochist. Anybody can make videos and upload them for the world to see. You click on one and then there are similar videos to watch.

I came across this cute couple out of Indiana. Mark and Ethan are great together. I've seen how they met, moved in together and go on boyfriend adventures. They are such a positive role model.

Makes me wish I had a boyfriend again. I'm due for one. I look at these guys and remember that my relationships started off like that. But then something happened.

I really wish the best for Mark and Ethan. Go to You Tube and meet them sometime. Here's a link to them https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTFVH1LbtoE

Chiflaco out.

Podiatrist

It was painful! I schlepped to the podiatrist today. He pared off about a lb. of callouses. It was painful but it had to be done. Problem was I had to pay extra since I'm not diabetic. If I were then it would be free. I have something worse and they overlook it.

It's so nice to be able to walk again. I still have knee problems and have been wearing my brace again. But it's such a relief. It's unbearable. It's like I'm walking on fire it hurts so much.

But I'm okay for another few months. He previously suggested pedicures but they didn't shave enough off. I'm gonna start seeing him every three months to keep it under control.

Went to the cinema while I was out. Saw Guardians of The Galaxy. Pure fluff but I wanted to see it. Watch for the DVD, nothing spectacular to write about. They did leave it open for a sequel which they've already decided on.

Chiflaco out.

Quiet Week

It's been a quiet week again. Didn't go out because of the heat. Not to mention my left knee is swollen and it's hard to walk with callouses. Of course they're worse on my left foot. I've been trying to make an appointment with the podiatrist but I keep getting his voicemail. He care pare down the callouses and he did recommend pedicures, but they don't shave enough off.

I went to the store yesterday morning and it was already hot. This was at 7,30 and the humidity was high as well. And it hurt so much to walk. But I still have to go if only to get Jean-Luc his food.

I've also been sleeping a lot lately. I blame the heat. I've been taking long naps and going to bed early. I've also been very bored. Nothing seems to catch my attention. I even saw a Kevin Costner film and that let me down. I mean, Kevin Costner! And if you don't know, I love him.

Let's see what today has in store for me. So far I'm ready for bed already.

Chiflaco out.

Dark Shadows

I'm still on a Dark Shadows kick. It started out in black and white and now it's in color. I'm up to 1967 and still have four years worth to watch.

I just found a Dark Shadows Almanac that has episode synopsis that I have on hold at the library. Apparently there are some other people into it also. Maybe if I read what's gonna happen I can stop watching the discs.

I do get fed up periodically but it's like a car accident, I just can't get away from it. The acting is horrendous and the writing predictable. I don't remember much that's going on, but I can still recite lines before they're said. Maybe I'm that intelligent.

Also, in 1991, the Dark Shadows creator rewrote the series with Ben Cross as Barnabas. It ran for only one season but I remember it was great. Well, they have it at the library and I'm watching it now. It's really good and I don't know why it didn't continue.

Okay, I have no life.

Chiflaco out.

Weight Gain

I've gained 14 pounds! Don't know how it happened it just did. I have been eating out a lot lately. It's just too hot to cook let alone bake. I've been in a baking mood but don't have the desire.

I've started eating salads again. I need to lose the weight. I just feel so fat now. I feel like I've gained 50 lbs rather than 14. I also feel bloated. There are times when I eat that I feel like I ate a side of beef. I can feel the food in my throat like I'm ready to throw up. I've started eating very light for dinner, usually toast or a PB&J. Otherwise I'd feel like throwing up.

Nothing much else going on. I've been exhausted a lot lately. It's probably the sun but I'm so worn out. Yesterday I went to breakfast with Andrew. The restaurant is three blocks away but I had trouble with my knee. It swelled up and I had to lie down when I got home.

Andrew is a neighbor. He's cool, he's straight but gay friendly. I can joke about things with him and he won't get paranoid. Bless his heart, he's had knee replacement surgery, a prostate cancer scare, and now he's got a brain tumor that they have to shrink before they treat him.

Eddie was very jealous and he was jealous of Andrew. Like I'm gonna do something with anyone. I haven't been sexually active in so long I probably forgot what to do. People say it's like riding a bike. Thing is, I never learned.

I've also been napping a lot lately. I think it's the heat. I wake up, have coffee and then get sleepy. I'm one of those weird people that don't find caffeine as a stimulant. I remember when I was a young whipper snapper, my Mom would put coffee in my bottle and told me to go to sleep, so I did. Guess it carried over to adulthood.

Chiflaco out.

Eddie

Eddie did get on my nerves, but he was still a friend. I always think of him on the first of the month. I have a Dream Guys calendar and he would always come up to check out the stud du jour.

I'm looking at Mr August and he's a hottie. Surfer type guy with a tan and sandy brown hair with highlights. Of course he's got great pecs and abs.

He was a character. Joseph came by tonight asking for a toothpick to clean out his pipe. Eddie used to do that all the time. He loved his pot. He gave up smoking and drinking but he held on to his pot. He did all that and he still died.

Oh the irony. Maybe I should take up some vices.

Chiflaco out.

Sunny and HOT!

It's fabulous weather out. The sun's out and there're blue skies. Perfect day for laying out. That's one thing I miss from Michigan. We used to have a deck out back and I could lay out to my heart's content.

It's too hot and I have no place to lay out down here. I'd kill for a pool and some sun tan lotion. And some cool refreshing beverage, preferably with some alcohol.

It's also humid out. I was actually perspiring in the shade today. I would have stayed home but I had to go pick up my bus pass. For $2 I can ride the bus for a month. It used to be free, but it's still a bargain.

Still a quiet week. No drama after last week. My finger is almost back to normal. Amen. Nothing much to report.

Jean-Luc has been very needy again. He likes to hop on my lap and take a little nap. This is usually when I plug in a movie so we won't be disturbed. Everybody loves him. He's so loving and affectionate. Not like some other cats I know.

Just wanted to say hello.

Chiflaco out.

Drs Visits

I have callouses on my feet that are very uncomfortable. I went to a podiatrist a while ago and he pared them off. He suggested I get pedicures saying that they can whittle down the callouses. NOT!

So I went to the doctor to get a referral. Guess I'll just see the podiatrist regularly to take care of them.

While at the doctor's, I mentioned some dry, itchy skin on my shoulder and ears. He said it was scabies and gave me a script for it. Turns out scabies are transmitted by cats! Jean-Luc gave them to me. I have to think about getting rid of him but that's impossible. Guess I'll have to live with scabies.

I also mentioned a swollen index finger. I bought a ring that got stuck and infected my finger. The doctor couldn't do anything for me but gave me the number to an urgent care clinic where they might have a ring cutter.

So today I went to the clinic and the doctor was able to cut it off. He bandaged my finger and gave me an ice pack. I feel so relieved. My finger was really bothering me. The swelling made my finger very tender. Okay, it hurt like hell. I had to do something about it. I did like the ring, it was a Buddha head and I kept it as a remembrance.

My finger is almost back to normal. I can still feel the ring even though it's not there anymore. My finger is still swollen but not as tender as it was before.

Other than that, I'm doing okay. I'm on the road to recovery. And I went by the pharmacy to pick up my script for scabies, and they didn't have it! They had to order it and should be delivered tomorrow. I'm very anxious about it.

Jean-Luc has been very attentive. Guess he knows something's up. He doesn't know that he's the reason I'm sick. Poor baby. I just can't give him up. We're too much in love to let a little medical problem come between us.

Chiflaco out.

Doing Better

I'm doing a whole lot better today. Victoria stopped by last night and suggested Vic's Vapor Rub. I snapped and rubbed some on. I almost immediately felt better.

I rubbed some more today and I just came back from the dead. I also had some chicken soup from Oasis. I love their soup with white meat, potatoes, celery, zuchinni and rice. I always order extra rice.

I ate some and felt great. I already told Mike next time I get sick to remind me to use the vapor rub. I know he'll remember. I know I'll forget.

I've been taking Nyquil and Dayquil and that's helped a lot. Of course the gargling also helped. It's just so nice to be back from the dead.

I just need days of recuperation and more chicken soup. I'll eat some just to be on the safe side.

Chiflaco out

Summer Cold

This is not funny. I've had a cold for two weeks now. Stuffy nose, sneezing, stuffy head, coughing, at least my fever broke a few days ago.

I am gargling with salt water or hydrogen peroxide. It's on the label, strange but true. I've done everything but chicken soup. That's next on the agenda.

Maybe that's why I haven't shown any interest in anything. I've tried to watch a movie or read but nothing keeps my attention.

I went to therapy today but my heart was just not in it. I'm doing okay but I still go for the disability portion. If they should investigate, they will see that I'm still seeing a therapist.

And my psychiatrist got booted. I have to start all over again. It's kinda difficult finding someone new. I have to feel them out to see if I'll be comfortable with them. We'll see.

I'm off to bed already. I'm gonna take some Nyquil and go to bed.

Chiflaco out.

Vicious

Vicious is a comedy on PBS. It's about a gay couple that has been together for 50 years. And they are vicious to each other and everyone. They throw zingers at each other that are hilarious. Starring Ian McKellan and Derek Jacobi, this is definitely worth watching.

Le Quartoze Juilliet-Bastille Day

14 July, Bastille Day or Le Quartoze Juillet. In 14 July 1789, the French stormed the Bastille starting the French Revolution. In 1790 France celebrated the unity of the French People. Vive La France.

This is also Jean-Luc's 6th birthday. He was born sometime in July and this is a good date as any. He's quite the charmer and he demanded a lot of attention today. I picked this day to celebrate his birthday because it was an easy day to remember.

Yes, he's been demanding a lot of attention lately. He sleeps with me and takes naps on my lap. I plug in a DVD and he cuddles and naps. He is so spoiled.

Chiflaco out.